Reflection

NOTE: Another long, boring one coming

The reflection on the window caught his eyes. Looking at his own reflection, he felt eerie and scared….. Taking a step backwards, he bumped into his bed and sat on it. No, all the glasses and mirrors in the house were creeping him out…… They were haunting him, reminding him of what he had done…

The bright green iris of the eyes with their dark pupils were boring into him, piercing him. His own reflection seemed to be glaring at him. He tried to avert his gaze, but the couple of eyes of the reflection seemed to have locked him. He couldn’t look away, he couldn’t escape. With much effort, he tore his eyes off the reflection and shut them tight, squeezing them till he could squeeze no more. Those green eyes, those beautiful emerald green eyes, they used to be soft, kind, dreamy and pleasant. How had they turned so deadly? The had turned so cold, so nefarious. He had killed this person, this person who looked exactly like him, but was so different. He had killed his lookalike and now his lookalike was there to avenge the murder which he had done cold-blooded, without a second thought. Why was this so hard to understand?

With caution, he stood up, turned his head towards the floor and slowly opened his now wet, bloodshot eyes. 

Not looking up still, he went to the window and careful not to look up, grabbed the curtains from the two sides and shut them hard. The hooks of the curtains rattled and the rod holding them shook a little. Without wasting anymore time, he turned around and fell on his bed, exhausted from the encounter with his reflection.

The soft emerald green eyes, as green as a ray of sunshine going through a leaf, were so harsh and unforgiving. The not so noticable sharp nose and chin had now seemed sharper than knives and deadlier that potassium cyanide. The high cheekbones and lips which had the soft look of petals had turned to stones: hard, cold, pale and merciless. How could Drew ever forget the deadly, venomous look of his own reflection? 

But it was his mistake. Well, not mistake. Killing a person deliberately, knowing the consequences, wasn’t a mistake. He had murdered a man in cold blood just so he could lead a rich life with a decent job. He couldn’t forgive himself…. How could he expect his victim to forgive him? He hadn’t even apologized…. Well, what’s apology to a dead person?

A few weeks ago, when he had first realised that his victim was haunting him by hiding in his reflection, he had gone paranoid and removed all the mirrors from his room and bathroom. 

His flatmate had asked what the problem was and why he was moving the mirrors out of his room, but he had shouted in agony and asked his flatmate to mind his own business and look at his own mirrors as they had separate rooms with separate mirrors and it should not be a bloody problem of Drew’s bloody flatmate to bloody look at his bloody self in his own bloody mirrors in his own bloody room and not talk about Drew’s bloody mirrors. Well, in short, Drew had freaked out and told the flatmate (rather harshly) that it wasn’t his business and Drew could do whatever he wanted with his mirrors. The flatmate had just stared at him, dumbfound more than offended, stupefied out of his wits. He had also muttered something under his breath that had sounded vaguely like ‘angermanagement’ and he was lucky that Drew hadn’t paid much attention to that.

But what was the use of removing mirrors when he could see the proof of his sin everywhere? Man, only if he could gauge his eyes out! But what use would that be? His nemesis wouldn’t leave him alone. And not seeing something, deliberately ignoring it, doesn’t make it non existent. Jesus Christ! What was he going to do?

Thankfully, in the outside world, no-one had noticed the absence of his lookalike. To be honest, the murdered person hasn’t been a very significant one and had never really existed to anyone. So, no questions asked, no nothing filed, no inquisitions, thanks.

Drew tried to clear his head in vain. But the more he tried to clear the clutter, the more the memories clogged his mind, blocking the way of clear thoughts. No, not a flashback, not now!

‘Not now!!’ Drew screamed as his body jerked and he dropped to his knees on the carpeted floor. His head hit the cold steel cupboard, but he didn’t move…. What could possibly be colder than those dead, green, seaweed-like eyes? They used to be like fresh green leaves. His own very eyes…. What could be more eerie, more uncanny that the hard, solid stare?

Desperate and frustrated, he shut his eyes tight as they brimmed with tears and tried to keep his stubbly chin from quivering. He let out a small groan from his trembling lips and his back muscles rippled with each silent sob. Dear, dear God, what could he do?

‘You must be happy now

To be the best to everyone somehow


You are what all want you to be

But look into your heart and try to see


What was your actual aim

It’s your life now not an easy game’

Drew pressed his fingers against his temples, trying to stop the throbbing, but it just wouldn’t stop. The headache was worsening by each second, as if someone was knocking nails into his head. Weeping and trembling, he curled up into a cacoon and fell on the floor with a thud.

‘Have you got what you want

Or will the once good dreams haunt


Don’t turn a dream into a nightmare

The rest of your sad life, it won’t spare’

Drew could not take it anymore…. What was it that was actually bothering him? The guilt that he had killed or the fear of the killed, what was haunting him? The guilt or the ghost? But in spite of every alligation and every finger pointed at him, he could still say that he had murdered because it had been necessary…. 

He had murdered a poet. An innocent poet, who had not done any harm to anyone, had to be slaughtered, yes. But there was a cause. Drew could show you the cause. Not one cause, but all the causes that he had seen (made up) after murdering…. Yes, um…. After murdering… That’s because he had flown into one of his rage fits and stabbed the person… Not exactly…. Well he had the idea of the murder before hand, well you see, it’s very hard to explain… Fumbling? Who is fumbling, surely not Drew! Fumbling infront of Judge Conscience? But Drew has Lawyer Excuse fighting for him. How can he lose possible. The opponent Lawyer Truth is strong, but not enough. Well, it’s a court case in Drew’s head. Why do you want to know anyway? 

Well…. Those who are fans of Harper Lee must know that it’s a sin to kill a mockingbird, right? Well, that’s the type of sin Drew had committed. But he had been lured towards luxurious houses, big cars, secure jobs and other perks…. And the poet had been an obstacle. Tell me, what would you have done?

I say that Drew is right. Poetry doesn’t give you a career honey! 

But Drew’s being right didn’t stop the poets last poetry from buzzing inside his head. It was so annoying, so true for him. What had he done? How could he live with this in his head?

He should have thought throughly, throughly before murdering the poet in him. He should have thought before compelling the poet in him to commit suicide… Wait, what?! What had it been? Murder or suicide?…. Don’t bother to find out, because now Drew was a guy with a good job, haunted by a poet that he used to be and annoyed by a poetry that he had written ages ago.

But one question still remained. The reflection that he saw in the mirrors, who was it of: the person he had killed or the person he had become?

NOTE: Yeah, I know it’s bad….. Basically, I don’t think I can write anymore… So if I wasted your time by making you read this, I’m not sorry…. It’s you who chose to follow me!

55 Comments Add yours

  1. Novus Lectio says:

    πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„πŸ˜„
    At least he’s not a murderer! He’s just a guy who changed his life. He can if he wishes to to be a poet again.
    I was wondering who he killed, i thought at first that it was his twin, but then i understood tht he was mental!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No, he wasn’t mental… Well, he’s just depressed that he gave up on himself and started a life on other people’s terms just to lead a normal life. And it’s not that easy to get back to that once you have lost the practice and got busy in other stuff…. Well, I guess stuff like these are necessary

      Like

      1. What ever happens, never sacrifice what you really want… It’s hard though

        Like

  2. She says:

    You really shouldn’t be so negative on yourself. You have some great ideas! Very interesting character.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You know this wasn’t good…. So do I…

      Liked by 1 person

      1. She says:

        I maintain that you have some very interesting ideas. Could you develop them a little more? You cannot lose the ability to write, I would suggest you have just lost faith in yourself, and if you have no faith in yourself, how do you expect your pen to take a different turn and create the next best seller.

        Take your time. Forgive when you write something you know is not your best–every writer has off days! Take a little time to think exactly which angle to take a story from. Sometimes before starting a chapter, I will sit for twenty minutes just thinking how to best start it. If it doesn’t come, I won’t write.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. You’re write…. I should stop pushing myself so hard.
        But can you point out what’s wrong with this one? I can’t pinpoint it and it is annoying me like hell. I need to find the problem

        Liked by 1 person

      3. She says:

        I would say it needs cutting. Cut it to half the words but try to say the same thing. I would also focus on description and get some nice phrases in there.

        Try to see it from the reader’s perspective, you need to tell them what they need to know, but you need to pique their interest whilst moving the story on. You need to make them want the answers to questions you set in their minds. Ask yourself, why should my reader want to read on? If you come up blank, you need to think more. Sometimes you just need a really good idea, if you feel lost with this story idea, come up with something fresh that does excite you.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Yes. That’s true. I should definitely try that. Thanks a lot. I needed some light there. It was just too annoying otherwise

        Liked by 1 person

      5. She says:

        Best of luck. Have faith in yourself!!! πŸ™‚

        Liked by 1 person

      6. Can I mail you sometime? If you don’t have any problem

        Liked by 1 person

      7. She says:

        Sure thing. I am a bit stuck for time sometimes, so I can’t always get back immediately, but I try to reply within three days most of the time πŸ™‚

        Chatwithnovus@gmail.com

        Liked by 1 person

      8. Okay 😊 thanks

        Like

  3. Arpan says:

    Why are you thinking negative? I find that story really interesting and this happens in the real world also. People choose money over dreams. And it’s a really good story. Carry on.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Do I know you somehow?

      Like

      1. Arpan says:

        I think yes

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Arpan says:

        I think you have forgotten….we used to sit together in junior classes…

        Liked by 1 person

      3. That guy? I still chat with him everyday. The problem is, when he is depressed, I tell him that it will be alright and it will all work out. But he doesn’t believe me and remains upset. He is the one being negetive! And here you are, asking me to be positive!

        Like

  4. Arpan says:

    I think yes….

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Arpan says:

      That was for some reason or so….okay then promise if I do not be upset and remain positive then you’ll also be positive always?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Promise. But you have to tell me if something bothers you and you can’t solve the problem. Ok?

        Like

      2. Arpan says:

        Okay done

        Liked by 1 person

      3. 😊😊😊

        Like

      4. Arpan says:

        When one gets friend like you then how can he remain upset for long??

        Liked by 1 person

      5. You’ll know that. Cause you are mostly upset πŸ˜‘

        Like

      6. Arpan says:

        I said na….I’ll not be anymore….but you have to be happy to…😊😊

        Liked by 1 person

  5. She says:

    Hello. Fancy a nomination. No obligation, just for fun! πŸ™‚
    https://thisdoorisalarmed.wordpress.com/2018/06/05/three-days-three-quotes-challenge-day-1-4
    Checked my mail today and hadn’t received anything from you. I didn’t know whether you had sent something or not though πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hehe 😁❀ thanks.
      Checked and it was in outbox. So resent it

      Like

      1. She says:

        Hmm, perhaps I mistyped address chatwithnovus@gmail.com

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Okay. Sent again

        Like

      3. She says:

        Yey. Received! I will try to get back tomorrow if I get time! πŸ’œ

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Kaycee says:

    This was intriguing.. Super great

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks Kaycee 😊😊

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Woah…This was an amazing piece. I first thought he killed his twin or something and then I realized that he chose money over passion. Trust me this was worth a reader’s time. πŸ™‚ I’d appreciate it if you check out my blog sometime…I’ve only begun with blogging and writing short stories and would appreciate any feedback or tips…
    https://fictivefinesseff.wordpress.com/
    Happy reading!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I did check it out. And loved your poetry and the way it rhymes. You a very talented person.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you so much. For your words of appreciation and for your time.☺

        Liked by 1 person

      2. It was worth it 😊😊😊

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks πŸ˜ƒβœŒ

      Like

    1. Thanks 😁😁😁😁

      Liked by 1 person

  8. johncoyote says:

    I love conversation and to read other people views. I enjoy your work. When I see your name appear on my board. I am happy. You are wonderful, filled with life and energy.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks a ton. You don’t know how much this means to me

      Liked by 1 person

      1. johncoyote says:

        I appreciate you too and you are welcome.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. 😊😊😊😊

        Liked by 1 person

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